Does the Golden Rule apply to Parents?
At YCS, parents and teachers work together to establish routines, confront difficult situations, be positive role models, and play an active role in the life of each child. We want to help parents in any way we can to provide moral support and spiritual guidance through open communication and mutual respect.
There are five golden rules for parenting that are practical and easy to implement, and if you apply them consistently, you are not only correcting negative behaviors that your child might be exhibiting but you can even prevent it from occurring in the first place. We hope that you will find them useful.
- Be a role model
Parents are the ultimate role models for children. Every word, movement and action has an effect. Discipline your child by being a role model and good influence. If you want your child to pick up good manners; be responsible, truthful, and calm; follow rules, be reasonable; never let you down; be good yourself. Children reflect parents and what they see around. If we want to change our reflections, we must change ourselves first. So, do your best as kids are watching you and model you.
- Show unconditional love
Being a reliable parent in your child’s life shows them that no matter what, they are loved. The love for your child is without any expectation of repayment. Your love is the basic ingredient for your child’s well-being. Love is communicated primarily by actions and not by words. As parents, you can offer your child empathy, or the capacity to understand or feel what your child is experiencing, getting to know your child’s personality traits and tendencies will allow you to work with them when necessary and help to support and encourage their unique and amazing gifts. Also, you can help your child learn from their mistakes and coach them to make healthy and safe choices. However, if your child completes his/her chores without your asking, acknowledge it with words of appreciation. The more children feel your love, the more they will listen to you and learn.
- Spend quality time with your children
The best thing you can make choices to ensure time spend with your children is high quality. No matter how busy you and your children are, have a “connect” time with your child. Do this face-to-face, if possible; but if this is not an option, create a routine for doing so in other ways, such as leaving a note or a picture in your child’s lunch bag, posting a note by his/her toothbrush, or writing an encouraging saying on a shared whiteboard in the house. Make and eat meals with your children whenever possible. Play with your child, even if it is during bath time or outside before you drop him/her off at school. Every little bit of time makes a positive impact. If you can, turn off technology when you spend time with your child. Try not to text, answer calls, scroll through social media or watch television. Meaningful connections are about quality of time, not quantity of time. Keep it simple and connect with your child in ways that make sense for your lifestyle and relationship.
- Spare the rod
Physical discipline is harmful and ineffective. It does not improve behavior and can lead to emotional, behavioral, and academic problems over time. There are studies reveal that spanking or slapping has a negative impact on a child’s development and self-esteem. Sometimes, children get out of control, or when you are dealing with your angry, tantrumming child, and understandably, parents tend to lose their temper and raise a hand to discipline kids. It may help the parent temporarily to vent their anger, but not only does it leave your child with bitter memories for a lifetime, it teaches them to resort to violence when they get angry. So, it is important to watch your reactions, both physical and mental.
- Keep promises
Keeping a promise lays the foundation for trust and respect. For kids this means being consistent in what we say and do. When we do what we say and say what we do, it makes children feel secure and it helps them learn the concept of commitment and responsibility. Remember to never promise things that you cannot do for him/her. If you keep saying things and you never follow through, your child will never listen or take you seriously. So, set a good example by acting with integrity.
Parenting is hard! There are many times when we are not sure how to handle a situation or how to navigate a challenge our kids are facing. A great way to gain wisdom in parenting is reading the Bible. This is one of the main ways God speaks to us. Through His spoken word. I would encourage you to read the book of Proverbs. It is full of wisdom and knowledge. You can pray the scripture over your kids and families, too.
May God continue to bless you and your family abundantly.